I looked over at Van last night—he was sitting against the couch with his legs outstretched crossed at his ankles, holding onto his beloved Lighting McQueen car, in a sweatshirt and underwear, watching “trucks” on tv—I stared at him in awe. He looked so big. They grow up so fast!
The photographer in me wanted to grab my camera.h The mom in me sat paralyzed because I didn’t want that fleeting moment, where he was actually sitting still, to end. The mom in me won. I sat there staring at him until he noticed. He grinned and said, “Mama, mommy”. Like he does in his sweet little voice, so many times a day that I’m ashamed to admit that sometimes it drives me crazy.
I thought back to when he came into this world as a scrawny 3 pound, 11 oz baby, and it brought me to tears. It brought me back to the whole NICU experience. How he was poked and prodded, and how we were trying to figure out how to best take care of our little dude amongst all of the NICU rules. I remembered how at that moment in the NICU, I was suddenly so grateful for my experience as a social worker because I knew exactly how to advocate for him and for us. He was so persistent, even as an infant, that he left the NICU earlier than predicted.
There he sat. With his disheveled hair and ridiculously toned quads, looking like a big boy. I know they grow up so fast. That’s what kids do. So I’m not going to be all “how did he get so big?!” because it didn’t feel fast. There were some LONG days over the last 2 years and 7 months. Along with some really fun days, some beautiful days, and some frustrating ones where I counted down the seconds until bedtime. Then, once I put him to bed I would miss him and wanted to wake him up an hour later. And it actually feels like it all has happened at a perfect pace.
And, here we are, experiencing it all over again with Dre. Just as he’s about to crawl. He is so happy and observant of what’s happening around him. They already play together, bicker, adore each other, and take toys from one another. I’m sure we will continue to be in awe watching our boys grow every step of the way. And I look forward to every moment of it.
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